Handshakes are common practice, especially in the professional arena. It is something I do when I meet someone for the first time. I introduce myself while performing a handshake.

There are several reasons why I do this, though the most important reason for me is that shaking someone’s hands is the polite thing to do. The other reason being that you are doing something, rather than just standing around awkwardly waiting for the chance to say your name.

Like the way you dress and speak, your handshake can also leave an impression in an individual’s minds, communicating to them many none-verbal signs. And like all none-verbal communication you want to make a good impression. Handshakes play a part in how people perceive you.

A good handshake leaves the impression of confidence, a willingness to learn and discuss, and a sense of equality. A bad one, or a complete lack of handshake can leaves the impression that the person is rude, not a team player, and possibly arrogant.

The problem is that despite how common handshakes are, not many youths know how to conduct a proper handshake. No one really bother to take the time out and teach a university undergraduate how to shake hands with possible future employers.

I have encountered many handshakes I would consider to be rather bad, and because of it I had to overcome some negative first impressions of individuals. The following are three (not the complete list by all means) signs of the worst handshakes I ever had.

Examples of Bad Handshakes – Avoid

This one is probably the one that I personally find the most irritating, and often leaves the deepest negative impression of a person. For me personally, it leaves the impression that the individual has no confidence nor do they know why they are at a meeting.

I always feel as if someone with an overly strong grip that they have something to prove. That they are trying to leave a strong impression when all they are really doing is hurting my hand. It also leaves the impression that they are trying to overwhelm you and do not view you as an equal.

This one confuses me the most – why do some individuals grasp my fingers to shake, or let me shake their fingers without palm contact? Because let me tell you it leaves me feeling as if I’m diseased, not something you want to convey when you are meeting someone for the first time, definitely not something you should be doing when meeting someone for an interview.

Tips for a good handshake

• Have eye contact with the other person.
• Face the other person squarely.
• Use a firm grip.
• Try and match the strength of the other person.
• Do not grasp fingers – palms should be fully touching.
• Keep your elbows close to your side – do not lift them sideways.
• Make one firm up and down movement. Do not over do it.

N.B: I have encountered several occasions when another person’s handshake can throw you off. Use the following as a guide to overcome them.

• Overly firm/strong handshake - match them, to the best of your ability, without over-effort.
• Loose handshakes from an individual – provide, what you consider, a firm but not overpowering grip.

In conclusion, handshakes are important; it is a way of none-verbal communication that leaves an impression. It is up to you what kind of impression you want to make.

A suggestion on how to improve your handshake: This worked for me but it may not work for you. Get a friend and practice with them until you are comfortable with shaking each others hands. Critique each other on one another’s handshakes; strength of the grip, eye contact and so forth.

Good luck!

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